I am starting the year by making simple changes to my way of thinking! I recently read an article on The Best Brain Possible that outlined the above list. It resonated with me and I thought I would share it with you and how I plan to practice these ideas in 2020.
My “day job” is an office manager at a middle school. Crazy as it sounds, I really love my job, my co-workers, and the kids. Yes, the kids. This is a very tough age with all the new hormones running rampant (I’m talking about the kids), learning to be responsible and independent, yet still needing adult support and direction. The energy that is created at this level is not like most jobs and requires a lot of patience and energy in return. But that’s OK…the rewards are worth it!
Stop trying to please everyone!
Being the OM does not mean that I have to accept everything being thrown my way to resolve. You would think working with children and adults would be totally different. In reality, not so much. Both want to be heard, have their thought or request validated and fulfilled. To most, this might seem like you are trying to please everyone. However, by implementing a different thought process it will not seem like you are “pleasing” anyone.
I have always wanted to do things for others thinking it would make me feel better but the more I did the more they asked for. I soon became frustrated with these people and no longer liked helping them. This feeling then made me feel even worse because that was not the person I wanted to be. I wanted everyone to feel like they could come to me whenever they needed to.
So, my new strategy is to focus on what I am giving back to the ones I am helping, looking deeper into what may be missing in their lives and why they are coming to me for help.
So many children do not receive the attention/love they need at home. Parents are busy working, children may live with a grandparent or other person, there may be drug or mental health issues, all of which affect how a child behaves at school. Recognizing this has allowed me to realize the student may need more than just solving their problem…they need someone to listen and care about their request. Looking at it this way I know I am being more than just a problem solver.
As for the adults, this becomes a bit more complicated. Some come to me and dole out orders; others submit requests. I am a true problem solver. I enjoy a good challenge so bring it on! I really try to interact on a more personal level. I like to include emojis in my emails, I send a daily bulletin out with memes or inspirational quotes…I try to a real person that they are communicating with.
By changing the level of interaction I feel like we are working together as a team. Being part of a team means we are working toward a common goal. Ours is to educate children and give them a safe environment to do it in. Practicing this method makes me feel good about their request, that we are working together, and not that I am trying to please them.